Orkid Says:

You can start anywhere and do anything with a good attitude and willingness to learn

Friday, July 12, 2013

Road not taken

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I couldnt travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth
Haiya....im in the middle of two junction again.

I am now exiting my graduate program in Shell. After 3 years of excitement, learning curve, high and down moments. So its time for me to think for my next permanent role. Alhamdulillah, the normal process is we have to apply for job in the system, go through interview sessions, etc. For those who are lucky, they get offers already. I am the latter.
At first i want to wait until my maternity leave ends. However, opportunities knocked on my door. I got 2

One offer is the role that im good at and i did it b4. But this time with different supplier. Basically this role manages the performance of the suppliers, tied back to their contract. This job allows me to perform at my own pace. I know i can do well in this position. Also the worklife balance is well taken care of. I am expecting a baby soon. Being faraway from my family and need to do everything from scratch, it basically freak me out.

The other offer is a lead/manager of 6 people. I will manage a service and people. This role is totally new even though i am well versed with the process as i was the process improvement analyst for that team. Imagine leading a team of experienced people, elder than me and i am totally no experience! Talk about firefighting everyday. Talk about managing ppl, process and customers. This role will really put me on stretch...however talk about opportunity and visibility that i would get (if i dun mess up). Also being a manager at my stage, it will really give me good learning curve.

I dont know. Being me i always love challenges. But i am not sure if i am capable. I will have a baby.. I want to be on top of everything. My career is very important for me and of course family is really2 important.
This situation reminds me of robert frost's poem.

Also a film that my hubs said this movie is abt me haha.
Watch "'I Don't Know How She Does It' Trailer" on YouTube

My husband is wonderful. He asked me to go for it and he will take care of the family.
Hmmmm...i dont know. Everything comes at the same time. Aaaa aaaa.
Anyone facing the same dilemma?
Can i choose both? I have always been told if u choose family u need to sacrifice career. Vice versa. I know if I choose the managerial position, I might not be the same person. I want to be a good mom and wife too.


zarith said...

kalau pilih dua-dua lagi kerja berlambak.

Tough decision jugak ni.
Bagi saya ambil je jawatan manager tu. A long the way, surely u can cope with it. Macam my bos cakap there is no such thing as work life balance. Apa yang kita boleh buat, is work life management.

good luck dear...

Orkid said...

ehhh no no. maksud i pilih dua2 ialah career and family. of coz kene pilih satu je keje. xleh dua :)

zarith said...

Hihihi.. salah paham la ni...

Fauzan Abdullah said...

Dear any decision will take later, I def will support you all the way.

Pasal family, no worries i can take care of our famiy esp our little diamond later :)